What Lady Gaga Should Wear Next

Since she clearly enjoys looking like a fool, I thought that I should compile a list of dumb-ass things she should wear in order to help her fulfill her apparent goal.

1. Nothing.

2. A Diaper and VS diamond encrusted bra & black Louboutins

3. A sheet & purple N. Kirkwood wedges

4. A hospital gown & flip flops [preferably to the Grammys]

5. A bee costume.

6. A Hat made with Freddy Kruger's face.

7. A dress made out of shingles and one of her hair pieces that are literally made out of hair.

8. A swan just like Bjork.

9. Sushi-- pasted on her most private parts only [like Samantha in SATC].

10. A snuggie.

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Oh the Horror!

Let's just call him -- "The-One-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named" [just watched Harry P, lol]...but Kanye West is the biggest jerk alive.I won't stay on this topic for long because everyone else has already touched on it, but why the hell would someone go on stage, grab the mic from someone and then insinuate at someone else should have won?!?!

News flash: Beyonce can't win everything!

I actually like Kanye, I like his determination and perservance and his "Don't Care" attitude but this time I had to say that Mr.West was dead wrong!

Now on to MTV's stage security--- all of you guys need to get fired.

Just because someone is a celebrity does not give them free access to a stage.

I wanted to slap fire out of Lil' Mama for intruding on Jay-Z & Alicia's performance.

Girl, are you crazy? No worries, I'm 100% sure that Jay-Z got in that ass

afterwards. Haha.

Speaking of fuccery -- Lady Gaga, I already told you that you are begging for attention

with those god awful outfits. It is no longer called creativity. It is called being a

damn weirdo. A sick ass weirdo with fools who go along with her assassine desire

for attention in the form of not wearing pants or head statues and all that other garbage.

**But on a lighter note -- Janet's performance was amazing.**

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Women in Society

I just happened to come upon this movie called Kiss & Tail:The Hollywood Jump-off.
It is a documentary about "groupies" focusing on Karrine 'Superhead' Steffans--- with commentary from groupies of Led Zeppelin to JaRule. Although, this is not a topic that we usually cover on HOSTAGE I had to share what I had stumbled upon! It's almost a shame to see how some of the women view themselves --- I was especially flabbergasted with some of the comments made from Modest Jones (in part one).

Part One:

zSHARE video - Kiss and Tail The Hollywood Jumpoff _2009__1.flv

The second part of the film is really intense.

It shows how vindictive and manipulative Karrine is.
Part Two:

zSHARE video - Kiss and Tail The Hollywood Jumpoff _2009__2.flv

The videos are worth the watch --- although you

may become annoyed trying to get through all the street lingo.

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Don't Be A D***head!

Dear Lady GaGa,

I remember when you were an underground singer and used to perform in clubs down on the Lower East Side. I loved your albums [the European one and the one that came out in America]. I stood by you in your pantless days and through your hairbows that were literally made of hair---but you have gone too far. You are clearly seeking attention. Why would you want to walk around looking like a muppet grave? Why would you want to be photographed looking like My Little Pony? I know why and you know why as well --- because you are desperate for attention.Your antics are becoming ridiculous. Cool out Stefani.

Sincerely,

Jenelle.Stasha

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The World is Ending

It's rumored that, as part of her image makeover, Amy Winehouse may launch a perfume?

When I look at Amy, the only thing that comes to mind is taking a shower!
I would never wear anything with her name on it--smh.
What is this world coming to?

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Shawty What's Up?

Cassie Ventura, another of Bad Boy's "artist", had want many describe as a "Britney Breakdown." She shaved half of her head and boy is she feeling good about it. She states, "They ask why?? Lol... B/C I WOKE UP AND FELT LIKE IT!!! YEEEAHHH!!! LOL :) Have a great weekend!xx."

I can only assume she was going for the Alice Dellal look. . .she missed. Alice has style and presence, which is why she pulls it off so gracefully. Cassie just looks, awkward.


On the other hand, she got us to talk about her. Diddy has taught her well. I say she shaves off the rest on the day of her album release. Just a theory.

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You Either Are or You're Not!

We’re in 2009 and shopping your life away isn't on the 'to-do' list anymore. The retail industry is in shambles and has had to scale back in order to continue to grow. Closets all over have slammed the brakes and now you’re stuck having to choose between paying those hot new shoes or your tuition bill. Damn it, times are rough. The words “Shop Your Closet” and "Recessionista" are being thrown around more than an Asian hooker on a Saturday night.

Shopping your closet simply refers to getting the most out of the things you already own. In such tight economic times when purchasing a new dress or pair of shoes at a whim is out of the question, what you already own can be the salvation to your fashion crisis, or so experts say.

But Teri Agins,a Wall Street Journal fashion writer, foolishly writes about hiring personal shoppers or independent stylists to show you how to pair items in your closet to create new looks. However, if you have money to hire a stylist, why not just buy the new item you’re lusting after?

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Have You Ever...

Have you ever caught yourself being retarded?I definitely have.

Over & over again.

Example: I ABSOLUTELY HATE twizzlers. Despite the fact that I know I hate twizzlers, if anyone around me has a pack I take one in hopes that it will taste better than it did last time--- it never does. I have done this more times than I can count. I'm very serious. I think I do it because I like strawberry but I am not getting any type of strawberry flow when I bite into it. Like what the hell is that about?

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Retarded.

Everyone spent less this year. Everyone. Banks went bankrupt, People went bankrupt, Companies went bankrupt. People lost jobs and pinched pennies. Black Friday wasn't as successful as in the years prior. The wealthy experienced "luxury shame". Obama was named President [ I just felt like including that,lol]. Designers are pulling out of fashion week fashion shows to hold less expensive private viewings.The term "recessionista" was coined. The Legendary fashion house of Bill Blass shut down! And it's just a proven fact that people are not spending money on unnecessary items.

Yet retarded ass Mischa Barton has a new handbag/accessory line and wants people to buy it. Is she retarded? No, seriously. She clearly hasn't been watching the news? But most importantly ... she is still stuck on Boho, who's still on that?

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Biting on the Reggae Artists

So check this chick out.
Play the video then follow the directions!
PLZZZZ!!!
Now... my rant continues.
LOOK UP MAD COBRA'S "PRESS TRIGGER" LYRICS [FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO ARE NOT CARIBBEAN OR DO NOT LISTEN TO REGGAE!] THIS CHICK IS REPEATING THE ENNNNNTIRRRRRRREEEE FUCCN SONG! I HOPE HE IS AWARE OF THIS AND THAT SHE SIGNED WHATEVER MUSIC THINGS NEED TO BE SIGNED BEFORE SIGNING SOMEONE'S WORDS!!!
BUT NOT ONLY THAT BUT THIS CHICK THEN THROWS IN KID ROCK'S MAIN LINE OF HIS "BADWITDABA" SONG [YA'LL CAN LOOK THAT UP TOO]---- WTF HAPPEND TO ORIGINALITY! SHE SUCKS! DAMN THATS A SHAME, SERIOUSLY!!!!

* she gave it a nice lil twist ---but still! damn hoe!

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This Is Not A Game Anymore!

Somebody please get this chick some help!

She clearly needs to be in rehab... yuck

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A Letter to Raven

Dear Raven, I remember seeing you on the Cosby show as I was growing up. I though you were so cool and so cute. You sure knew how to pull Bill Cosby's strings! Then you moved on to other things and my favorite was when you appeared on Disney channel's Xenon: Girl of the 21st Century (which I watched again a few weeks ago). After that you disappeared and came back with your very own Disney show called That's So Raven.
The show in it's entirety was OK. But the thing that had me the most was how horribly your stylist dressed you. I was really concerned with the state of Disney Channel's show stylists, because this wasn't the only show on in which every character on a show looked like hott shit!
But I gave you a break.
Then I continued to see pictures of you out at different events looking like you done went and got dressed by a clown or a blind person(I mean don't get me wrong, you've had some instances in which you looked really nice). But I realized it was you. Raven, it is you. You have no style... no stylist would do this to a person so therfore everything is your fault. I would just like to let you and the world know that this outfit was the last straw. THIS WAS THE LAST STRAW! I will not allow myself to be victim to seeing you as a hott ass nasty tranny looking mess.
So Goodbye Raven, your presence, your show (does it still come on?) and your style will definitely not be missed. And during this time when everyone turns their back on you I employ you to look for a stylist or just start hanging out with the surprisingly effortlessly fashionable Solange.

abrazos y besos,

Jenelle.Stasha

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Train Your Damn Kids!

I cannot believe this!
This little girl is lawless and she WILL be a slut.. skank.. pop.. ho, trust me it's inevitable!
Look at the way this little girl is carrying on and everyone around her is cheering her on. SMDH!
Raise your children right. This girl is at the oldest like 7. She need to stop and her mother is clearly not a good role model.

stupid hoe! ---

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This Girl Doesn't Stop...

...but I'm tired of her!
OMG, yes she is undeniably beautiful and there is definitely something about her that is intriguing but that's where it stops.
I've tried to resist posting anything about Little Miss Sunshine b/c everybody is going to insist that I'm hating.
The girl CANNOT sing, DOES NOT have her own sense of style [ya'll best believe that's a STYLIST behind all her 'transformations' that is making her into a "style icon"(insert eye rollage here)]
Yeah she made that cut famous this season... but let it be known that I had it before her thanks to magical Justine =]

But now that there is word that she might start her own fashion line I just couldn't deter speakin about her any longer.

HOW MANY CELEBS NEED TO HAVE AN EFFN CLOTHING LINE?!?!?
This just looks like a rerun... so cut it out! And don't tell me you're sorry 'cuz you're not! 'Cuz girl I know you're only sorry I put this uppppppp! [i had to reference and change up some song lyrics, lol]

Oh boy, and wtf would she put out that not already out there?
Rihanna please sit down!
Grab your clothes and get gone, ya better hurry up! [last time, I promise! lol]
Despite that... this girl is giving me MUCH in these photos from her spread in InStyle magazine.
Enjoy!


I'm loving those Gucci studded booties!

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And the Ignorance Continues...

If you decide to wear a shirt like this:

Then you have definitely go to be prepared for the backlash! Some racist asshole decided to wear this shirt and ended up getting jumped by four black girls!!!! hahahahaha

She couldn't have thought she would be safe walking the street with that on could she?

The woman ran away from them and called the “Apollo Braun” store where she had purchased her t-shirt to complain about the attack and demanded a refund for the t-shirt, which cost her $69[ personally, I wouldn't buy a shirt for $69 that clearly looks like it took 5 minutes and a couple cents to make.. don't front, u know it looks cheap!]. The owner stated that he doesn’t give refunds because it is against his store policy and that no one forced her to buy the shirt.

Yes, the shirt is offensive and clearly racist but only an idiot would think to wear it without the thought that they wouldn’t get beat down while walking around NYC.

Does this article make you angry? Are you shocked by the racism and foolishness that is occurring in NYC by people who aren't wearing a navy uniform?

Hopefully you are... but not to fear! You can call the shop owner/shirt designer and the dumbass who wore the shirt!

[numbers courtesy of fashionindie]

I’d strongly suggest calling both between the hours of 1:00 AM - 6:00 AM.
To speak with Nathanaeli Nassimi [the dumbass]about the incident, you can reach her at phone number: 516-220-7024.To speak with Doron Braunshtein aka Apollo Braun [the owner], you can reach him at phone number: 212-726-8075.

have fun!

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No Take Backs!

LMAO. So Yung Berg aka "Yungin" has decided that he messed up big time. So he threw out this sad looking apology video. First of all, if he is as rich as he claims to be, why is he taping in that dump? Second, he said comments taken out of context. How could what he said have been twisted. He never denied saying it so those must have been his exaxt words. And then he had the nerve to talk about "my mother, she's a lovely dark skinned lady." And you made those comments? As a dark skinned female, I want to let him know that he HAD/HAS zero fans. Please, stop trying to fix it. Stop making music. Just diappear. Like poof. But whatever, left the video so people can mock him. It's fun.

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Who Are You?.... No, Really

picture source: the ybf

It's 2008 and you would think that all the ignorance about the difference in skin color of African- Americans would have stopped already, like seriously all those who have ever said ' too dark/ too light' has a problem with themselves! The many different shades are what makes African Americans beautiful!

However, ignorance is alive and pumping especially in the veins of midget, lil' lil' Bow Wow, no talent rappers with a lysp such as Young Berg. This is what he had to say during a radio interview. And shame on the dumb girls who were laughing like it was funny! Mind you one of them was dark skin!

“I’m kinda racist … I don’t like dark butts …. You know how some women prefer light skin men or dark skin men. It’s rare that I do dark butts - that’s what I call dark skinned women … I [don't date women] darker than me.
I love the pool test. If you can jump in the pool exactly like you are and you don’t come out looking better than you looked before going in the pool - then that’s not a good look.
Any woman that uses brown gel to set down her baby hair is not poppin’”

Pool test? wow.

Everyone has their preferences, but as a young, beautiful, intelligent dark skin young lady, he totally disrespected by calling dark-skinned females 'dark butts'.You can't even tell me that's not ignorant!

Does he have a fan base? [crickets]

Do people take him seriously? [crickets]

It's amazing that he would even say this crap in public without any shame!

He disgusts me but unfortunately, he is definitely not the only male who feels this way, he is just the only one not ashamed to say it.

For the most part, all ladies could conduct a pool test as well. Everyone who can stand in the shallow end without having to tippy toe in order to survive passes! lol...

Click the title to link the audio.

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Zoe Kravitz

Why?

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Times Must be Hard for Superhead!

After countless affairs and sexual trysts with different celebrities.

After two books about her slackness, The Vixen diaries & Confessions of a Video Vixen.

Karrine "Superhead" Steffans plans to put her mouth to work by rapping.

Let's just take a moment to laugh at her together!!! LMAO!!!! WOW!
Superhead is signed by Eddie Murphy's new record label, Murphy Entertainment and will be bringing her "talents" to work and begin whoring herself out on CD.
I wonder what her songs will be about??
Sex sells, but this is ridiculous ... times must be hard.
What the hell was Eddie Murphy thinking??

Let's just patiently wait to see how far this actually goes.

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